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Cult of Chood

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THIS ARTICLE IS A HOAX
The subject of this article is about as real as the jarty is alive.
Take everything below with a grain of sproke.

THIS ARTICLE IS FULL OF LIES.

Do not take anything written here as a fact - It is very likely this entire article is a complete work of fiction.

That is not dead which can eternal lie,
And with strange aeons even death may die.
hp mcdonalds or however the craft is loved
Haha, he's just a swolesome sort of guy. The extroverted chad we all needed. …Wonder how the guy's going now that he's gone.
He beckons...
Cobson is rumored by some to be a member of the Choodist cult.
A Choodist thread.The first Choodist thread, which brought the Faith out of the heart of its first practitioner, and evangelised the earliest believers.
Histrion's Soysona

The Cult of Chood, also known simply as Choodists were a meta-soylitical, occultist movement with a meta-groupist structure that arose on the sharty sometime after Froot's purchase of the site and subsequent reign of the Soyumvirate. It was created by a soyteen known as Histrion. They were dedicated to the praise and worship of Dr. E, otherwise known by his more well-known pseudonym Chood during his 4 hour reign over the sharty. They were monotheistic in nature, and discouraged the outright praise of any other admin besides Chood. Choodists were highly superstitious, believing the most intensely in Poopson and Admin 6 per capita.

The Cult developed its own terminology, such as nicknaming Admin 6the Nigger”, and “HWASUIOGTON,” which may mean “He Will Always Save Us In Our Greatest Time Of Need,” but this is unconfirmed.[a]

They believed that, despite his short time as admin, Chood had done more for the site than any other admin and was a "gigachad badass". There existed a sect of Choodism that even believes he is Admin Ϫ, but this is highly debated. Ultimately, the goal of Choodists is to establish a theocratic reign over the sharty where the worship of Chood is mandated and enforced by jannies and moderators.

Even doe it was just one person who forced it

Theology[edit | edit source]

new theology just dropped

All converts into the Cult of Chood are required to make the following oath: I renounce wholly and sincerely Sootism; I renounce wholly and sincerely Captain Coalism; I renounce wholly and sincerely Kuzism; I renounce wholly and sincerly Dollism; I renounce wholly and sincerely Maxism; I renounce wholly and sincerely Captain Cobism; I renounce wholly and sincerely Angelenism; I renounce wholly and sincerely Frootism; these falsitudes against our truest convictions on the bestness of the Gigachad, the Badass, literally Neo from The Matrix, whose name is Chood.

History[edit | edit source]

Background[edit | edit source]

Main article: Dr E

Dr E, the Choodist's main focus of worship, was initially a controversial figure in the sharty because of his admitted newfagginess and desire to advertise his Tor-based mushroom business. That is until the Soypocalypse occurred, and Doll temporarily took the site offline. It would briefly return on August 22nd, 2023, this time under Dr E's leadership. However, this was unknown at the time, and he opted to remain completely anonymous. The soymmunity would end up nicknaming him Admin 5, and more commonly, Chood.

During his 4 hour rule, he unbanned everyone affected by the Soypocalypse, wipe the catalog, slaughtered Baby bot, and implemented a temporary measure against 'p spam by replacing every new image with an image of A24 Slow-Burn Soyjak with his mouth closed. The site would then shut down again, with Chood disappearing into the shadows, never to be heard from again. It would not be until Doll's final few days as admin after Froot's permanent restoration of the sharty that Chood would be confirmed as none other than Dr E.

Cult's Formation[edit | edit source]

The exact date of the cult's formation is unknown, but it is assumed to be around September 2023, as this is when Chood appreciation threads began to pop up and get necrobumped. Histrion then started to form the "cult" as we know it, as opposed to simple appreciation. While the cult remained fairly obscure initially, many began to discover Choodism during The Great Purge, namely anti-Frootists.

The Great Purge[edit | edit source]

A naked Choodist.

ALERT!!

¡ALERTA!

That grand thread of appreciation; that telamon of esoyteric Choodist spirit; that lightningrod of the greatest Asbestos; was suddenly and deliberately attacked by the janny forces of the Empire of Froot. Yes, the Faith is under attack; yes, our greatest thread of appreciation, of veneration to this mighty Renovator Soyperii to whom all splendours of our lives are directed in his interest, the first thread of them all, whose creation did evangelise the first generation of Choodists, was deleted by Froot. The days are cold - the lights do flicker - Froot’s mask has slipped off: he is now the Nigger.

Anniversary Scuffle[edit | edit source]

After Froot sided with the Discord derailers during the Anniversary Scuffle, the Choodists, in their holy war against the Nigger, sided against Froot by default.

Collapse of the Cult[edit | edit source]

After many attempts at destabilizing the Frootist New World Order, the Cult of Chood was delivered a final and totally destructive deathblow by none other than the Dollist God-King, DOLL. By revealing the Choodists' font of worship to be none other than Max, the Choodists were wrought by grief and stricken with panic. In desperation, Choodist (now Maxist) forces wiped /nate/ (which is specifically designed to be easily wiped), Froot added a wordfilter which changed Chood to Max. Their icon having been revealed to be totally corrupted and responsible for the Soypocalypse that "Chood" was supposed to deliver them from, Choodists were left with an identity crisis. Do they stay true to their beliefs and now believe Max is the future savior of the sharty, or do they abandon the teachings and await the return of Doll or perhaps a new admin such as "Scar"? Cult numbers dropped to their lowest numbers and many days often go by without mention of Chood, and so unless new information comes out, the Cult is nearly dead.

Histrion[edit | edit source]

This nigga is an Aspie

Please remind him to breathe deeply from the toilet bowl.

This 90s retroart, vhs anloag horror is so good!!!

Histrion (unofficial now official name) is the Soyteen who created the concept of the Soysphere and the Cult of Chood.

Histrion is perceived as being intelligent due to his in-depth ideas and wide vocabulary, he's also said himself "Yes, I'm not humble" in response to someone saying his IQ is high.

He created an internet philosophy known as Histrionic LARPing. According to this, he believes that in order to become an internet legend and create an entertaining, new type of A24 slowburn kino narrative, a type of which is completely new and differs from novels and choose-your-own-adventures, you must create 1 or more personas in a community and create controversy in order to harvest Reactions from internet users, as these reactions are what makes the legend, Even if we instantly knew every foggy detail about the person in question, he would still be immortalized as a legendary historic and mystical figure, because of those past reactions.

The above may have brought up thoughts about Kuz, which would be accurate as Histrion says Kuz, Max and Kolyma as a whole are all the forefathers of Histrionic LARPing. Especially Anton Maximov, who Histrion secretly admires for creating multiple mysterious online personas such as Chood, Dr. E and Max, all of which fall under Histrionic LARPing

He in the sourced thread, argued back and forth with Froot,[1][2] which began when another user claimed Chood was the best admin in a thread about ranking admins. He argues that Froot did not follow through with the Histrionic LARP potential of the Frootist Defense League, which he could have used to garner infamy, and Reactions. That and Froot giving up his potential of being a Legend by being 100% transparent and boring as a person instead of making up a backstory and LARPing

Froot argues back that his identity should not be the center, or even a part of the discussion that happens on the sharty, he likens it to Toyota customers caring about the CEO more than the car.

Histrion wants to be an admin, he proclaimed to have fantasized about it.

Literally everything in this page is sourced from citations 1 and 2. Each of his responses are always a wall of text.

Histrion once explained the purpose of the Cult of Chood: >The joke with the cult of cho00d is that his followers praise him in incredibly corny ways (thereby mocking actual admin worship), I say this as the creator of the cult.

suspected histrion babble in a thread about UTTP

Enemies[edit | edit source]

Sects[edit | edit source]

In the organisation’s history it has experienced 2 schisms, all of which from comments made by Doll. Each is rejected by some and accepted by others, producing various sects.

1) Doll claiming that Dr E and Chood were the same individual on August 22nd 2023.
2) Doll claiming that Chood and Max were the same on Sep 19th 2023.[3]
Chood != Dr E Chood = Dr E
Chood != Max Choodpuritans Emporiumites
Chood = Max (nonexistent) Foul Maxists

An additional element is the belief in Chood being Admin Thrembo, in which case the adjective pentathrembite is used, eg pentathrembite choodpuritan.

The Foul Maxist sect is met with disgust by all other sects and by all other ideologies, including by most Maxists, being seen as a twisted perversion of the original Choodist ideals. The main supporting claim for them is a belief in the Mandate of 'lent (which produces following list of Admins), and, crucially, a belief in Lolkek having been made admin at least once, even if as a joke:

  1. Soot
  2. Lolkek
  3. Kuz
  4. Doll
  5. Max
  6. Froot / Angeleno
  7. Root
  8. Boot ?

This places Max as Admin 5, and the Soyumvirate admins Froot and Angeleno as co-Admin 6s.

Notes[edit | edit source]

  1. It is certain that the initial letters of this acronym stand for "He will always ...", cf. HWABAG, a common epithet of Cobson.

>OH MY SCIENCE THIS IS JUST LIKE THE JEWISH REBELLIONS IN ROME

  1. Error creating thumbnail: File with dimensions greater than 12.5 MP
    Histrion's thread
  2. more from him
  3. https://soyjaks.party/chive/thread/16459.html#16806 "Alright well don't say I didn't warn you. Yeah it was Max. If I say any more I'm probably gonna get some lecture tomorrow morning, but I hope that clarifies things."
Cult of Chood is part of a series on
Soysphere Admins, Jannies and Notable Users
Soysphere Admins and Jannies [-+]

Soyjak.Party : Froot (Owner) ♦ Root✝ (Admin) (Also Known as NuAdmin and Marsey.) ♦ Doll✝ (Admin) ♦ Angeleno✝ (Admin) ♦ Kuz✝ (Owner) ♦ Soot✝ (Owner) ♦ Captain Coal✝ (Admin) ♦ Thanos (Admin) ♦ Mustard (Manager) ♦ Red✝ (Manager) ♦ Ronald✝ (Developer) ♦ Mud (Developer, ex-Manager) ♦ Lolkekkeklmaolmaolmaoxdhaha✝ (Mod) ♦ Sobot✝ (Mod) ♦ Mist (Mod)

Soybooru.com: Froot (Owner) ♦ Lolkekkeklmaolmaolmaoxdhaha✝ (Owner) ♦ Soot✝ (Owner) ♦ Doll✝ (Admin) ♦ Bartholomew (Admin) ♦ YaroslavTV✝ (Mod) ♦ JoelWarlock✝ (Mod) ♦ Mist (Mod) ♦ Teto✝ (Mod) ♦ ClydeMcDeath✝ (Mod) ♦ Lifesucksthenyoudie✝ (Approver) ♦ Sectionalism (Approver) ♦ Satoko_houjou_fan✝ (Approver) ♦ Blackskinaryan✝ (Approver) ♦ GemersonLakeAndPalmer (Approver)

Soyjak.Blog : Broot (Owner) Weebhunter3000 (Admin)

Wiki.soyjak.st : Froot (Owner even doe he never uses the wiki) ♦ Tefal (Head Admin) ♦ Mud (Admin) ♦ Mata✝ (Admin) ♦ Gem Control (Mod, prominent user)

Soygem.Party : Scar (Admin) ♦ Angeleno (Owner) ♦ Joel✝ (Mod)

Jakparty.Soy✝ : Lute✝ (Owner)

Notable Users [-+]

Influential/Notable namefags : Albert✝ ♦ Hamas_2 (Booru gegbull) ♦ Italian Chad✝ (Booru gegbull) ♦ Joel✝ (creator of Slopjaks, influential sharty poster) ♦ King Caesar✝ (Started the FPE spam) ♦ Mexican Twink✝ (Influential sharty poster) ♦ Romanian Schizo✝ (Influential soyjak artist) ♦ Satoko_houjou_fan✝ (Influential booru poster) ♦ The Bulgarian (Influential soyjak artist) ♦ The Swede✝ (creator of Soyjak) ♦ The Venezuelan✝ (Started the fnf spam)

Other Notable Users :Soyjak Party Video Archive (Youtuber, Archive) ♦ CobsonTALKS (Youtuber) ♦ @soyjakpartyofficial (Tiktoker, Unconfirmed to be official) ♦ Histrion (Founder of Choodism)

Miscellaneous Lists [-+]