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Soylentities

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The Soylentities are entities which have reportedly been sighted in and around the Mental Asylum. At first it was thought these entities were merely hallucinations of schizophrenic patients who had consumed extreme quantities (>10L) of Soylent. However they were proven to exist when a security camera captured footage of one in the Soylent Shortage Riots of 1999. Four soylentities are known to exist. They appear and disappear randomly around the asylum, pointing and screaming "(You) (You) (You) (You)" at patients and asylum staff.

The 4 known types of Soylentities

Variants[edit | edit source]

Soylentity Class-A: A Guinness World Record soyjak with removed eyeballs and a faint static glow outline.

Soylentity Class-B: A schizophrenic Markiplier soyjak with a realistic looking hand.

Soylentity Class-C: An elongated mouth soyjak of unknown base type, eyeballs removed.

Soylentity Class-D: A monstrous bald soyjak with a realistic pointing hand

Risk Assessment[edit | edit source]

Due to their non-violent nature, soylentities are generally considered "low risk" and are assigned a threat level of "low". A soylentity can only be summoned if a patient has a BSC (Blood Soy Content) of above 2%, so they are a rare occurrence. The sheer volume of their "(You) (You) (You)" screaming has caused some patients to become temporarily/permanently deaf. As such, Dr. Soystein, a key researcher of this topic, recommends patients to wear ear plugs or noise-cancelling headphones if they consume more than 9 liters of Soylent in one sitting. BBC therapy is known to resolve hearing loss issues for some patients affected by the soylentities' screaming.