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The Lawnmower Man (Soundtrack)
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The Lawnmower Man (Soundtrack) refers to the spine-tingling, genre defining, slow burn atmospheric musical compositions utilised on the motion picture classic The Lawnmower Man and its videogame adaptation.
Composition[edit | edit source]
The tracks for the movie were made by an aryan with A10 eyes called Dan Wyman, some of the sounds used to compose were sampled from the surfaces of Hyperborea and Agartha.[it just is, ok?] Most of the tracks used in the movie have a futuristic vibe to accompany the themes of technology, as well atmospheric tracks that complement the movie's dark tone. Some of the track names include:[2]
- Jobe's Fury
- Game of Hearts
- Man Wants
- State of Shock
Reception[edit | edit source]
The lawnmower man soundtrack received overwhelmingly positive reviews from critics, who cited it as being on the same quality as the one's of Beethoven and Mozart, even receiving an 9/10 from The Needle Drop. The music has attracted the liking and been played by various famous musicians and bands, including Da Joos, The Chud and CobSOn.
Usage on Cobbification[edit | edit source]
It is said that prolonged exposure to the soundtrack will turn the listener into Cobson.[3] The reason is because the songs release magnetic waves at a frequency of Ϫ.0π nano hertz, which causes alterations on the function of the subject's brain and nervous system, also mutating xhis cells and tissues.[4]
Symptoms[edit | edit source]
Turning yourself into a Cobson is a slow burn, spine tingling process that might take weeks to fully complete and even more time for your body to get fully used to it. This condition accelerates early pattern baldness on males and creates a deep and strong desire of keeping your mouth open at all times, it also worsens your eyesight causing the need to use glasses. Becoming Cobson also grants you God-like powers, even doe those only work on VrChat, other simulation vydia and the internet (just like my heckin Serial Experiments Lain!!!) which makes them borderline useless because you are only God here, and not everywhere.
Side Effects and Variations[edit | edit source]
Cobbification might bring a few negative effects of being a soyjak. Users that became Cobson saw a big decrease in the level of testosterone, as well as increase in the wish to consume soy, with some reporting the need to take 10 bottles of soylent per day in order to survive. Other side effects may include the increase in posting and/or addiction to Reddit and owning the chuds.
It is said that if you listen to the songs in reverse, you are gonna turn into Rapeson instead due to soytanic powers. This causes you to gain an enormous cock but also makes you want to rape and commit crimes, making this transformation not recommended by decent human beings. There's also been rumors of the existence of a lost media rap remix of the Lawnmower Man soundtrack, which if listened to, will turn you into Spadeson. If you are a woman that listen to the songs, you are gonna become Femson instead of Cobson, although you have to be a real woman for that to work, so trannies aren't able to use this method for a transition.
